Review by Eric Page
Grab your tissues and your truth-telling pants, because this memoir is serving realness with a side of revolution! As someone who’s navigated their own queer odyssey, I found myself snap-clapping, ugly-crying, and belly-laughing through much of Komail Aijazuddin‘s raw and radiant story.
From the first chapter, when little Komail is living his best *Little Mermaid* fantasy life atop classroom furniture in Lahore, I felt seen in a way that made my heart do somersaults. Here was a kid who, like so many of us, knew he was paddling in a different pool before he even had the words for it. The way he captures the exquisite agony of being the “different” kid – the one with the spontaneous Broadway eruptions and the body that refused to fit in – is hilarious and heartbreaking.
“The larger-than-life stories, bold characters, and unapologetic flair have often mirrored our own journeys of self-discovery.”
We’ve all had our versions of “if I could just get to [insert gay mecca here], everything would be perfect!” And Aijazuddin’s American dreams will feel familiar to any queer person who’s ever plotted their great escape. I made it out and now live in the Gilded Ghetto of Brighton, but what makes this memoir so special is how it transcends the typical “it gets better” narrative to explore something deeper: the revelation that true liberation isn’t found in a place, but in the long, messy journey of learning to love yourself.
The author’s relationship with his body, complicated by cultural expectations and internalised shame, is handled with such tender complexity that I found myself putting down the book several times just to reflect. This is raw, honest writing, but done with such warm style that even in these heavier moments, Aijazuddin’s wit sparkles like a fresh coat of glitter – proving that sometimes the best way to deal with pain is to bedazzle it. Side-eyes the trauma councillor!
The social conflict is all too real: Aijazuddin vividly describes being labelled “not Pakistani enough” in his homeland, where suffocating tenets of faith are ‘inhaled with a baby’s first breath’ dictating your survival is who you know, your own skills are immaterial unless you’ve got the connections to exploit them. Then, in the U.S., he’s faced with the opposite challenge—he’s suddenly “too Pakistani” for the gay scene, which has its own complex, unwritten rules for fitting in.
His memoir is candid, raw, and often laugh-out-loud funny – a rare, unapologetic glimpse into the life of a gay Pakistani navigating identity in two worlds. For so many gay men, as documented in camp and delicious detail in this book, theatrical musicals have been more than just entertainment—they’ve been lifelines.
The larger-than-life stories, bold characters, and unapologetic flair have often mirrored our own journeys of self-discovery. Musicals offer a space where queerness is celebrated, not hidden, with themes of love, resilience, and belonging guiding us toward acceptance. Aijazuddin’s experiences show that they teach us that our voices deserve to be heard, our stories sung, and that we can claim our own spotlight in a world that often tries to dim our shine.
This isn’t just another coming-out story; it’s a coming-into-yourself story. It’s about realising that the very things that made you stick out as a kid – those fabulous pirouettes, those fearless feelings, that fierce authenticity – aren’t burdens to shed but gifts to cherish.
For every queer person who’s ever felt like an outsider in their own skin, for every dreamer who thought happiness was a destination rather than a journey, for every soul who’s struggled to reconcile their culture with their truth – this memoir isn’t just a must-read, it’s a must-share, must-celebrate triumph.
In Manboobs, Aijazuddin confidently establishes himself as a fresh, sharp voice in humour, delivering a wickedly funny and poignant exploration of love and the courage it takes to truly be yourself.
You can see more of Komails’ work, art and writing on his website.
Out now, £10.99
For more info or to order the book see the publisher’s website here:
