George Vere’s hour-long confection is a riotous piece of grade-Z science fiction in which a rather bijou starship has to battle cheaply made monsters, a demoralised cast, Vere’s monstrous ego and some of the worst sci-fi power ballads known to humankind. Slowly its creator’s ego trip, during which we learn a lot about his character’s good looks and sexual charisma, goes off course as the other actors mutiny against the writer’s poor grasp of plot, character and even basic science.
Captain Harrison (Vere) has objectively been proven by the ship’s computer to be Starfleet’s bravest and most handsome captain. Perhaps his character owes some small debt to a certain James T. Kirk – like Kirk, Harrison wears the same tight polyester outfit, is irresistible to women and has something which often sounds like an American accent. Although there is a nominal villain in the form of Zaglar, it’s fellow crew member Evans (Aiden Willis) who seems to be bear the brunt of Harrison’s contempt. Willis is eventually pushed to breaking point as his, and the cast’s, resentment of getting paid nothing to appear in a crap show results in them breaking the rules of theatre and rewriting the show on the hoof. Rather in the manner of Kirk taking the Kobayashi Maru test.
It’s a lovely evening of theatre, and I certainly look forward to Vere’s next production. My only quibble would be the show’s paucity of actual, crafted jokes. Though as the whole enterprise (pun intended, obvs) runs perfectly well on its leading character’s demented self-belief maybe it doesn’t needy anything more sophisticated than some missed cues, knitted space aliens and some terrible, terrible songs.
In this Dick Barton style cheap spy thriller monologue Rebecca Dunn as Times newspaper fashion and gossip columnist Lady Pamela, conjures up a world of high society, smart clothes, Nazis and the abdication of Edward VIII.
It’s a very tongue in cheek narrative, unconsciously snobbish and at first innocent of the rise of Nazism, Lady Pamela becomes a feisty, gutsy heroine of the Second World War, even parachuting behind enemy lines on a mission of national importance.
It’s a wonderful performance as she gets to know but be friends with “that woman” – the King’s mistress Wallis Simpson. Referred to throughout as “the charwoman”, Lady Pamela finds out the details of her affair with “the silly King”.
From the opening scene when she declares “How can people get so worked up at what’s going on in other people’s countries?” she progresses to a patriotic self-awareness which is humane, well-observed and touchingly humorous.
Everyone is defined by the clothes they wear in Lady P’s world and of Wallis she says: “They say she’s a clothes horse but I’d say more horse than clothes.”
One night of passion with her handsome MI5 handler Charlie leads to the amazing revelation: “I can never have children but I try not to think about it.”
When she hears a deadly world-shattering secret from Wallis about the ex-King’s intentions, she is shocked to discover that not only does the British Government already know, but that they plan to cover it up.
And so, her amazing exploits over, she goes off in an air-raid to take shelter.
Playwright Sarah Sigal has created a truly remarkable character who could well have further theatrical outings in other tales .
And in Rebecca Dunn we get a talented creator of many characters who should certainly have a terrific future.
The play, staged by Fluff Productions, runs at the Warren Theatrebox till May 29.
Is our use of poppers impacting our ability to see the wood for the trees? By Craig Hanlon-Smith
My own introduction to poppers back in 1993 was of a completely non-sexual nature. I arrived at a late night (straight) party in the back streets of deepest south London, to find a packed living room containing a deep shag-pile rug, behind which a gas fire was blazing. Periodically, the hosts would pour amyl nitrate or whatever the blazes was in the inch high bottle, onto the carpet. Wholly stupid fire risk aside, we all buzzed happily along for hours.
A couple of years later; the tube trip back into Soho from London’s Gay Pride event at Victoria Park, and cut to a carriage rammed with gay-men singing ABBA songs at the tops of our voices, passing round a handful of small brown bottles to dozens of homos we had never set eyes on before and would possibly never see again. “Does your mother know that you’re ‘out’?” we screamed in between the sniffs and bouts of hysterical raucous laughter. We barely noticed the handful of Japanese and American tourists who looked on aghast, clutching their children close to their bosoms in the firm belief that they had all died and gone to hell.
Fun times then, and yet, in the remembering I’m cringing somewhat and mightily thrilled that both smart phones and social media were still some 20 years away. I was taking poppers from strangers on the dance floor for years before I graduated onto their frequent use as a sexual relaxant, in the assumption that they were completely harmless and after all, they’re fun right?
For years, urban myths surrounded poppers use, particularly in relation to how many brain cells they were killing compared to alcohol, but in recent months a wholly more sinister health problem connected to the use of poppers is emerging. “I didn’t make the connection at first,” David, local and regular on the scene, tells me. “I just woke up one day and couldn’t see clearly. It was like there were patches of water on my eye, or as if I’d just stared into sunlight – you know that distortion you get immediately after, only it didn’t go away.”
David presented immediately at the accident emergency department at the Royal Sussex County Hospital, but doctors were baffled. Over several weeks his eyes appeared to get better until six months later it happened again, only much more severely. “This time I went to the optician who referred me immediately to the specialist although I had begun to make connections between the problem and poppers use myself by then.”
David’s own connection of his vision difficulties and poppers was confirmed by the specialist who made it clear this was not the first case he had seen.
Robert Purbrick
I spoke to Robert Purbrick, Consultant Ophthalmologist at the Royal Sussex County Hospital, and asked if the issue concerned actually getting poppers into the eye (we’ve all been there right?). “No! This issue is not a direct effect of the poppers, so closing your eyes when sniffing the bottle won’t help either. It’s chemical, so I would expect these changes [to vision] if the poppers were injected for example.”
Poppers, which are used as a relaxant, specifically, although not exclusively, by gay men for use in anal sex, operate by expanding blood vessels, which in turn lessen involuntary muscle movement or spasms. They also bring about a temporary high in the form of light-headedness and giddiness, which is why they’re sometimes used in a non-sexual context, such as club dance floors.
In 2006, a common ingredient, isobutyl nitrite, was classified as a cancer-causing agent and banned in the UK and France. It remains in use in much of mainland Europe and the chemical composition of poppers in many countries remains unchanged, but not here. The replacement chemical, isopropyl nitrite, is what is now thought to damage the fovea, the part of the retina responsible for central vision. The issue is known as ‘Poppers Maculopathy’.
I asked Robert Purbrick if the problem is widespread in the Brighton & Hove area. “I have nine cases on my personal database. We’re planning a study to try to assess the prevalence of Poppers Maculopathy in the local population, examining clinical signs, which could be present in the absence of symptoms. Poppers use is very high in the UK amongst the population of men who have sex with men so we’d expect to pick up quite a lot.”
A little light research indicates this issue has been knocking around for a few years with initial reports as far back as 2010 and the first recorded UK case in Sidcup in 2012.
Martin McKibbin
Martin McKibbin, Consultant Ophthalmologist in Leeds, has reported that within the past 12 months, a small group of patients in Leeds, Manchester and North Wales who have used poppers have experienced fluctuating vision and that whilst in some patients vision has recovered to normal when they stop using poppers, in others it has not. McKibbin is clear: “Visual problems have been observed with both one-off and chronic use. Some patients have experienced damaged vision after just one dose.”
A recent report in The British Journal Of Ophthalmology suggests that poppers use may cause serious and permanent eye damage. Lead researcher, Dr Rebecca Rewbury, stated; “The mounting body of evidence [suggests] that poppers can have serious effects on central vision. Users and health care professionals may be unaware of the risk.”
This study followed 12 men who presented with blurriness or blind spots in their vision within hours or days of poppers use. Researchers examining the chemical makeup of the brands that the men used found they all contained the post-2006 ingredient isopropyl nitrite.
In 2015, poppers were included on a list of so-called legal highs debated in Parliament prior to the introduction of a wider ban, which included synthetic cannabis and nitrous oxide as part of the Psychoactive Substances Bill. Conservative MP, Crispin Blunt, outed himself as a poppers user in the debate with much media coverage and poppers were eventually left off the list.
I asked Robert Purbrick if with hindsight he thought that leaving poppers off the ban was wise, and whilst he wouldn’t be drawn on the question directly, he told me: “There is plenty of evidence of harm from poppers in the form of poppers maculopathy.” Some of which was available prior to the debate in 2015. “I think an erroneous label of safety could be applied to poppers through their omission from this list.”
I ask him, considering the wide use of poppers amongst the gay community, what advice he has for anyone using poppers either during sex or other recreational activities. His message is clear: “It’s not advisable. And certainly in the context of any visual symptoms then they should stop use immediately and either visit an optician or attend Eye Casualty at Sussex Eye Hospital. A macular OCT scan (optical coherence tomography) is necessary for diagnosis.”
And whilst our local friend David’s vision is much improved, he remains concerned. As our conversation ends he says to me: “This issue is totally under the radar and nobody is talking about it.”
Some names have been changed at the request of those interviewed. @craigscontinuum
Morgan Fabulous chats to Jackie Perry, the co-owner and manager of Velvet Jacks on the border of Brighton and Hove about what makes it the perfect place to relax and have a cocktail.
Velvet Jacks is a small and quirky independent bar with both friendly staff and customers, it’s the kind of place you can walk in to on our own and instantly feel at home and relaxed. It celebrates it’s second year birthday on May 23, which is also the date of Jackie’s wife, Eve’s birthday.
Jackie grew up in the east end of London, in the 50’s, in the kind of place where your Aunt and Uncle lived next door. The whole neighbourhood was like one big extended family and you could leave your doors and windows open without a second thought.
She worked as a prison officer for 14 years, with women, young offenders and people serving a life sentence. But, Jackie wanted to see what else the world had to offer and decided she would go traveling.
She travelled around Australia on two separate occasions for 6 months at a time, lived in Key Largo, which is an island in the upper Florida Keys archipelago for three and a half years and also backpacked around South East Asia for a few years in the 90’s.
Before Velvet Jacks, the place had been a family run restaurant for the last 30 years. Her wife, Eve, owned the tattoo shop next door to the restaurant and had always wanted to turn it into a bar if the opportunity arose. When she heard it was being sold, she managed to persuade the owners to sell it to her.
As Jackie had already run a themed bar and restaurant in the east end of London, which unfortunately attracted a poorly behaved crowd, she was more than happy to get back behind the bar and transform it into somewhere she and like-minded people would love to socialise in.
They totally redecorated and replaced everything in the bar except the Artex ceiling, transforming it into a cosy hang out. Jackie says it feels like a cave inside and keeps them nice and warm in the winter. They have a team of five all-female staff who are very friendly and accommodating.
The bar attracts a wide clientele from gay woman and men who enjoy good wine and cocktails to locals dropping by for an after work drink. Jackie and Eve love dogs and enjoy being around people who share their interests.
Olive and friend wait for their Gin Bowl
In fact, most days you will find Olive, their Airedale Terrier entertaining her friends to a Gin bowl in the bar.
First and foremost Jackie is a people person and the bar is a way of life to her. In fact it is her life, and she thinks of it and her regulars, like her large extended family.
It is evident in the decor and the great customer service that Jackie loves the bar and wants others to love it just as much as she does. She serve amazing cocktails and Gin bowls, and everyone who drinks there is guaranteed a warm and friendly welcome.
Today sees me one week post op of my fourth, and hopefully last, hair transplant surgery.
Back in late February I headed to Latvia after a long search for a surgeon who would take on my hair restoration case. A tricky one due to the very advanced state of my balding. In April’s Gscene I covered the search for my surgeon and my experience of Latvia as a solo trans woman, to read online, click here:
I returned from Latvia having endured 2 days of surgery averaging 14 hours per day. 50% of my restoration complete and surgery dates booked in early May for two more days in theatre to complete the work.
As torturous as the process was and as hard as I found it to be alone and trans in an Ex-Soviet State it’s not those experiences that have stayed with me over the last 2 months and lead to a spiral in my mental ill health, causing me to isolate myself from those I love and avoid social situations. It was the actual thing that I am proactively trying to correct, my lack of hair.
Following surgery my head is swollen, painful, very delicate, takes a lot of care, and wigs are completely out of the question. Whilst pre surgery I could choose to wear a wig or not. Post op I was unable to wear one and that is completely different. Should I wish to wet shave my head and present as a bald woman, all power to me. When I am post op and have patches of hair growth, areas yet to be worked on and areas with baby hair growing I do not feel like a powerful bald woman but I am more conscious than ever of my head and troublesome hair. In the two weeks before my second trip I was able to wear a wig despite pain and itching for a few hours, but a few hours afforded me some welcome dysphoria relief.
I now feel like I am back to step 1. I am, once again, miserable for the summer ahead of me, having to stay out of the sun, covered up, without a wig, and I hate it. I hate that I wasn’t allowed to transition as a young girl before I lost my hair, I hate that nobody would help me when I was a teenager, I hate that I grew a beard that I am now slowly ridding myself of, I hate that I am 6ft 2, I hate that I am a size 10/44 foot, basically I feel as though I hate being trans.
Who would choose this life for themselves?
Being trans is so tiring. I question my ability to continue with transition. I wonder whether I should have taken what seems the easier path of suicide, opposed to the much harder path of transition. I wonder if I will ever be happy with my outward appearance. I wonder if I have the strength to make it through these next turbulent years as my body goes through transition. I wonder if I will still be a victim of suicide, but then, I remember.
I remember that I have invested many thousands of pounds into my transition already. I remember that I have just put myself through four 14 hour long operations to restore my hair, full results of which I will not see for around 2 years. I remember that I am battling the side effects of HRT and that the results of feminisation will not peak for many years. I remember that I am working towards further surgeries in 2018 and 2020.
Going through these slow processes, planning them, and seeing them through makes me realise that I am investing in my future. I actually have a future, I don’t hate being trans, and I am not going to be the victim of suicide.
I am a proud trans woman and I love the fact that I am finally able to transition. I do see a life for me in old age, I do have a plan, I plan to live. Being trans has allowed me to live, and, therefore, I love being trans. I love myself, and I am doing everything I can to make my future a long, productive, and worthwhile one. Being trans has saved my life and I try my very best to be a good advocate and activist for the cause.
Being one week post op, I am, of course, feeling sorry for myself. I recognise all the signs of Post Operative Depression. I am sleep deprived, in horrendous pain, I can’t chew as it hurts my temples, and I am struggling to self care and remember my pills and injection regimes. Despite all this I must tell myself it is only temporary, it is another step to feeling as comfortable with my gender presentation as I do with my gender identity, and that it is all part of my bigger plan. A plan that does not include suicide.
“I wonder if I have the strength to make it through these next turbulent years as my body goes through transition. I wonder if I will still be a victim of suicide, but then, I remember.”
Peer Action, the HIV peer support and social group charity for people living with HIV in Brighton & Hove have appointed a new chair and have announced a relaunch of the charity.
Gareth Lloyd
New Chair Gareth Lloyd previously worked in the city. He brings with him business and legal experience and currently works locally for a national charity.
New trustees have been appointed to the board to help improve the charity’s reach and increase peer interaction.
The complete board now is Adriana Naves-Silva, Aileen Norbury, Gareth Lloyd, Michael Nelson and Terence Clarke.
Previous chair Mike Nelson stood down at the end of his term and continues as treasurer/fundraiser for a further term.
A new website will shortly be launched with a revised look and the charity intends to continue to offer alternative therapies, yoga, swimming, educational and social events.
Gareth said:“I aim to expand upon the firm foundations we have built up over the last three years and develop the charity within the community.”
The first person many LGBT+people meet when they arrive in the city is the bar person at their local LGBT+ venue. These gatekeepers to the community provide an important role both befriending and signposting new arrivals to the scene. Gscene finds out a bit more about them and what makes them tick.
Matt Richards works at the popular Bedford Tavern, the community pub on the border between Brighton and Hove. He has won the Golden Handbag for Favourite Bar Boy three times and been runner-up twice in the last five years.
Where do you come from?Guildford in Surrey.
What brought you to Brighton? I moved here with my then boyfriend as we loved the place! That was 21 years ago.
Oddest thing you’ve been asked for?A guy asked to buy my underwear. I politely declined, they were my favourites.
What’s the worst kind of punter?I love all customers obviously?!?
What do you do when it’s quiet in the bar?I really enjoy chatting with people. The quieter periods are as important as busy times. It gives you time to learn about your customers and they you. Also if Adam (the boss) is reading this I do lots of cleaning and tidying!
Do you know the difference between Ale and Beer? Ale is more flavoursome and fragrant, whereas beer/lager is crisp and refreshing.
Can you pull a pint?Of course! Perfect head always!
Do you prefer to be shaken or stirred?Now that’s personal. I love a good shimmy, so somewhere in between.
Whats your favourite tipple?I have a new-found love for gin. We have started stocking an extensive range with complimenting tonics. I’m enjoying myself working through the menu.
What makes you roll your eyes?Bad manners and people who think they are always right.
Are those really your photos on Grindr? I’m not on it (shame Ed.)
What makes a perfect barman/girl? Personality. You can teach a person how to pour a drink, but to give good customer service balanced with banter is something you’ve got or you haven’t.
Where do you like to go out when you’re not working?I go to lunch quite a lot, but also like a good pub. I really enjoy an afternoon bevvy. I go to the Brighton Tavern often as I used to work there before the Bedford, so have lots of friends there. The Grosvenor is another as its close by and friendly. Night time there is only one choice… Bar Broadway! I love a camp tune.
Tell us a secret about yourself? A lady never divulges!
What’s your nickname behind the bar?Tilly (my drag persona for Easter Bonnet).
Are you single or in a relationship?I’ve been with my husband Aaron for over ten years. We got married two years ago.
“HIV isn’t the worst thing, it’s everything else that goes around it – from stigma, to financial issues”
Terrence Higgins Trust (THT) are to host a professional conference on supporting the first generation growing older with HIV.
One in three people with HIV is now aged over 50, and new diagnoses among older people have nearly doubled in the last decade – meaning health and social care sectors are entering uncharted territory.
To make sure health and social care professionals are prepared, THT is hosting a conference to increase awareness of the needs and challenges for those growing older with HIV.
Speaking ahead of the conference, 52 year-old Simon Horvat-Marcovic has shared his experiences of living with HIV in his 50s, from dealing with stigma to homelessness and financial issues.
Simon Horvat-Marcovic
“I’d been living in Camden for 16 years, but in 2015 I was made redundant, I was going through a divorce and had two cancer scares – so found myself homeless. I sofa surfed all over for 18 months, and then the day I was diagnosed with HIV was also the first day I slept on the street,” said Simon.
“HIV, believe it or not, wasn’t the worst thing to happen to me that year – it was everything else that went around it – my housing, my mental health, my other health worries.
“Medically I’m great now, I see my doctors regularly and have health check ups, but outside of that, my mental health and home life, it’s not always that great. For us, the first people growing older with HIV, we’re going into the unknown, and there is lot we all need to learn.
“If it wasn’t for organisations like Terrence Higgins Trust, I’d be dead now – not because my HIV would have killed me, but because I would have killed me. I know issues around depression, housing and finances, and stigma affect a lot of older people with HIV, so more health and social care professionals need the skills and knowledge of HIV so they can support us as we get older.”
THT found that poverty, loneliness and social care are major concerns for older people living with HIV, and earlier this year warned of a social care ‘timebomb’ ahead, following their groundbreaking report, Uncharted Territory.
The report found 58% of over 50s living with HIV were on or below the poverty line, and 82% experienced moderate to high levels of loneliness – three times more than the general population of the same age.
The ‘Caring for a generation’ conference, on June 12, will support service providers and professionals from all sectors to understand the issues faced by this ageing population, and how to support them.
Speaker with HIV aged 50 and over, like Simon, will share their experiences and join leading academics from Imperial College London and Manchester University in workshops and tutorials throughout the day.
The conference is being hosted by the pioneering Health, Wealth and Happiness Project, from THT, which focuses on the needs of people over 50 living with HIV, offering tailored services to improve their emotional, physical and financial wellbeing.
Clive Blowes
Clive Blowes, National Co-ordinator for Health, Wealth and Happiness Project, said: “Every day at THT we work with people over 50 living with HIV just like Simon.
“We know that isolation can be a major issue, and that many people are worried about having to go into a care home, changes to their benefits, housing issues and relationships and dating. Our report found that eight out of ten of people with HIV aged over 50 are concerned about whether they will be able to access adequate social care in the future.
“This conference will help provide professionals and service providers with up-to-date knowledge of what it’s like growing older with HIV, and provide support and advice on how they can help this new generation of people live well.”
Caring for a generation conference takes places on Monday. June 12, 2017, from 9.30am until 4pm at NCVO, Society Building, 8 All Saints Street, London N1 9RL
Cheek2Cheek is unique, in that it is the only LGBT+ ballroom and latin dance club in Brighton & Hove.
Originally set up in 1998, it continues to provide an alternative to the commercial gay scene with a relaxed and welcoming atmosphere.
You do not need to have a regular dance partner to join the weekly classes; many people attend alone and are able to benefit from learning steps with different dance partners on the night.
Many ballroom and latin dances are covered – examples include waltz, foxtrot, rumba, cha cha cha, bossanova, jive, samba and tango. Sequence dances and line dances are also included regularly. You will be taught by a fully qualified instructor, Robert Singer, who has 25 years of dance teaching experience and is also a member of the UK Same Sex Dance Association.
The club meets on Tuesday evenings and has recently moved to St Mary Magdalen Church Hall, Selham Drive, Coldean BN1 9EZ, which has a great wooden dance floor.
The programme is as follows:
♦ Improvers 7.30-8.20pm: For people who know the basic steps in most dances. The lesson concentrates on one particular dance for 2 weeks at a time, rotating through Ballroom and Latin styles.
♦ Beginners 8.20-9.10pm: All welcome! The basic steps of 2 different dances are covered in the lesson (one latin, one ballroom); the same dances are repeated the following week. Improvers also participate in this class to help beginners, and to improve on their own style.
♦ Social Dancing 9.10-10pm: After the 2 classes refreshments are provided (tea, coffee, biscuits), payment is taken (Improvers £9, Beginners £7) and they continue the evening with social dancing. This often includes the opportunity to learn a line dance or sequence dance.
Over the years Cheek2Cheek has also run tea dances and New Year Balls, and on several occasions has taken part in the annual Pride Parade, dancing the whole way! As they approach their 20th anniversary they will be looking to organise one or two additional social/dance events and are building on their partnership with BLAGSS (Brighton Lesbian and Gay Sports Society) to achieve some of this.
Dancing is good for emotional and physical health, it is also a lot of fun! So why not go along and try it out? You will be welcomed and your first class will be FREE.
Many of us will have considered suicide at some point in our lives. Many of us will be living with a degree of suicidal distress, some on a daily basis. Many of us will have seriously considered acting on those feelings. Many of us will have tried to kill ourselves. Many of us will know someone who has tried or who has died.
Talking about suicide is vital. It’s a mistake to think it’s better not to mention it. Have a conversation about suicide today, now, tomorrow, every day. We don’t need to wait until we’re worried about someone, we don’t only need to talk about suicide to people who we think might be depressed or anxious or upset. We need to talk about it now, we need to acknowledge our feelings about a distressing subject. We need to create communities where it’s safe to talk about suicide.
For many of us who feel suicidal, there seems to be no other way out. Feelings of suicide should not be underestimated, they are real and powerful and immediate.
But it is also true that:
♦ Intense suicidal feelings will pass, suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem
♦ When we’re depressed, we tend to see things through the very narrow perspective of the present moment. A week or a month later, things may look completely different
♦ Most people who once thought about killing themselves are now glad to be alive. They say they didn’t want to end their lives – they just wanted to stop the pain.
For many years, MindOut has been running a pioneering, unique suicide prevention group. The group, called Out of the Blue, brings together LGBT+ people who have lived experience of suicidal distress, to create a supportive, safe place to talk about feelings, to share how we survive distress, to learn from each other, to end the silence and the isolation.
You might think that talking about suicide is wrong, that it encourages or even gives people the idea. You might think it’s better to avoid the subject and not to open up. The evidence of our group work shows how positive and how useful it is to talk. Eighty per cent of group members reported significant reduction in the frequency and intensity of suicidal thoughts and 60% reported significant improvements to self-injury.
“I didn’t think the group would be helpful to be honest, but I was so wrong. I’ve never spoken about my desire to kill myself before; I thought people would consider me selfish, a horrible human being. I found the courage to talk and in turn I found support and friendship.”
As well as reduced suicidal distress, group members report improved sleep, being better able to deal with anger management, feeling less isolated and more informed and empowered.
Out of the Blue meets weekly, same time, same place, same people for nine weeks at a time. New people can join at each nine-week break.
Such is the success of peer support that we are now running a second Out of the Blue group, for trans and non-binary people. Suicidal distress in trans and non-binary communities is extremely common. One study found 84% of trans people reported acute suicidal distress. Of our trans advocacy clients we’ve found it to be at least 90%.
“I’ve struggled to stay alive all of my adult life, my suicidal thoughts are constant… I’ve been continually misunderstood by mental health professionals… pathologised, judged and abused because of my non-conforming gender identity. MindOut services are the only support I’ve ever had. I would be dead today without MindOut.”
Groups are not for everyone, and not for everyone right now. It has to be right for you and has to be the right time. Many people come to MindOut wanting to talk things through one-to-one with another person, for support, needing information, wanting to find out what there is which might help their own situation, which may or may not include feeling suicidal. You can talk in confidence to an ‘out’ LGBT+ mental health worker.
MindOut has produced two help sheets, one for people feeling suicidal the other for people supporting someone who is suicidal.
View: www.mindout.org.uk/resources where you’ll also find a suicide pocket resource, MindOut have paper copies of both. Both have details of other crisis support services.
When talking to someone who is suicidal remember that staying calm and listening is the best response.
You can:
♦ Ask them about why they want to die, what’s happening now that feels unbearable?
♦ Ask about any other support they have, have they told anyone else?
♦ Ask if there is anything that is OK about their lives, what might be worth living for?
♦ Ask what would keep them safe right now, for the next hour, the next day etc and help them make a safe plan.
If you want to talk about yourself, you’re supporting someone else and if you’ve been touched by suicide in any way you’re more than welcome to contact us. You can phone or email and we will respond as quickly as possible. You can contact our online service (see below) which is open in the evenings and at weekends. On Wednesdays you can drop-in to Community Base and see someone there and then, and the online service is open during the day as well.
MindOut info:
All MindOut services are free, confidential, non-judgemental, person centred and independent. All MindOut services are run by and for LGBT+ people with lived experience of mental health issues.
I am a proud trans woman and I love the fact that I am finally able to transition. I do see a life for me in old age, I do have a plan, I plan to live. Being trans has allowed me to live, and, therefore, I love being trans. I love myself, and I am doing everything I can to make my future a long, productive, and worthwhile one. Being trans has saved my life and I try my very best to be a good advocate and activist for the cause. 
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